Titles

I’ve been reading The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas. It’s taking me a while (I’m not a fast reader) but I’m fascinated by titles. In the early 1800s, you could buy your title as a Count, be a Viscount, be declared “Sir” by royalty, or be born a Marquess or Marchioness. Titles were such a big thing, and now, as I grow older, I find myself using the word “sir” with my own sons.

It’s probably a bit old-school. I certainly didn’t experience that in my many years in Australia, but in the U.S. I’ve heard more people calling me “Mr. Julio” as the months pass. At first I laughed, and then Spanish-speaking people started calling me “Señor,” and that’s when it hit me: I am no longer “muchacho” or “young dude,” at least not to anyone except my parents.

I’ve never cared much for titles, but I do believe our senior citizens -those much older than me- should be respected and even venerated. I don’t want to lose the “Sí, señor(a)” or “Yes, sir/ma’am.” I want my kids to be respectful not only of their peers, but also of the seniority that comes with experience and years. I don’t want my kids to silence their voices in the face of injustice or doubt their opinions, but I do want them to express themselves with respect and manners, even if they speak loudly.

The world is a little too loud, and some leaders are lacking manners. I want our future leaders to be respectful to one another. That’s why I try to raise my future leaders that way (it’s not easy).

And I will say “yes, sir” and “sí, señor,” even if I feel awkward when someone other than my sons uses those words for me. The good thing is that the title that fits me best (and the one my kids use the most) is “Daddy.” And that is my favourite one.

Recently someone called me “art director,” and I thought: Did I earn that? Did I ask for it? Can I buy it? I don’t know. I think I did earn it. But “a daddy that likes drawing” feels better.

Still, I like titles, at least when we use them to treat people with respect. I hope that when I am very old, you will still listen to me, and I ask you to do the same for our senior citizens, whoever they are.

Art direction created for Inhabit’s Podcast team